homelessness

I feel homeless right now. I understand that its a part of transitions. I have been through enough of them recently! Port Alsworth doesn't feel like home yet. I am getting used to the daily life of walking everywhere, being able to go home for lunch, and only worrying about wildlife on the commute instead of wild drivers. I am getting to know people in the community a little better. I just get to the point where I miss having people around me who have experienced life with me.

When I went to Anchorage last month, I had to prepare myself. I had just begun to feel settled and established in Anchorage when I left. I had to tell myself that the city I was visiting is no longer home. It was great to spend some time with friends, and I can only imagine how easy it would be to be absorbed back into the city lifestyle. At the same time, I often found myself looking around and feeling out of place.

We went to see a movie at Bear's Tooth Friday night. Bear's tooth has two dining areas and a one screen movie theatre. They show movies that have mostly cycled out of the main theatres, as well as some classics and documentaries. The theatre is set up with booths and tables, and food is brought to you during the movie. A fun, and very popular, experience in Anchorage. I looked around at the crowd as we were leaving our movie. The line was all the way around the building for the next movie, and every seat was full from our movie. I think there were more people there at that point than live in my entire burough.

Anchorage, with all its entertainment and crowds, is not home. I am ok with that. But Port Alsworth isn't home yet either. When I am frustrated, I long for home. But where is home? Its a good way to remember that I was not created to be on earth forever. It can be my dwelling for now, but its never going to be a place to settle down.